Know Your Own Heart

“Therefore let us, as many as are mature, have this mind; and if in anything you think otherwise, God will reveal even this to you.” Philippians 3:15

My friend was telling me about a woman she’d known for a long time, who was angry at her in-laws for not giving her a chance to be a part of their family. She complained to my friend, “They’re so mean to me. They don’t even make an effort to know the real me! I’m shut out.”

Then my friend changed the subject. She told me how she was petting her dog recently, and the dog zealously climbed up in her lap and nipped her on the arm because the dog wanted to play and had gotten rather rambunctious. Her skin wasn’t broken, but she did get a small welt on her arm.

When she was done telling me these two stories, I saw a real connection between them. This is exactly how people are with other people sometimes. They are just living their lives as they always do, but without meaning to, they are hurting others with their words or actions. They don’t mean to be hurtful—they often don’t know they are hurtful. Many times in my own life I’ve been called out for saying “the wrong thing” and causing more pain.

We often don’t know our own heart. The last couple of books I’ve read, along with our HER Ministry Bible Study, have exhorted me to “stop and think about it.” As I’ve considered my own ways, I realize I have harbored unfair (and often untrue) biases and prejudices against certain people groups, politicians, cultures, clothing styles, and other identities, that have no basis in God’s heart. These are ways of thinking that come from childhood and life experiences but not from God’s Word. These things become imbedded in our personalities until we no longer know they are there. It’s like that picture hanging on the wall that we’ve passed by so often, we forget it is there.

Thankfully, God sees not only actions, but attitudes. A day comes along when we plainly see what we’ve missed for so long. He reveals what was hidden. He makes clear what was foggy. We see ourselves for what we are—which is what He has seen all along.

It’s a good thing, though. We’d hate to be left in our sin. It would be awful to stay as we have been, to be the product only of our own experiences. We need the Spirit of God to change us, to remake us in His image, to give us the mind of Christ.

Father, we pray for You to mature us. Teach us to put a watch on our lips so that we do not speak a word “out of season.” Reveal to us our attitudes towards others, especially those long-held attitudes we aren’t aware of. And teach us to love with Your love. Amen.